Veneer on Rotting Wood: The #CleanerLagos Hoax
Welcome to Lagos, the original capital of Nigeria. Yes, Abuja may house the federal administration and lay claim to the name, but it can't touch Lagos anywhere else. So I — once again— welcome you to Lagos, the jewel of the Sub-Saharan coast. Lagos, the deformed child of Victorian London and 21st Century Monaco.
To write extensively on all the issues pervading Lagos State would be too much of a Sisyphean task for anyone let alone a very young member of the electorate. So I've summed it up as best as I can in four words: Veneer on rotting wood. If you don't look, you'll see only the polished beauty, ignoring the decay beneath.
Do not be deceived. I am not writing an exposé, neither am I 'FFK'ing' the administration. I'm simply sharing my views on one persistent problem that’s been faux-solved. The Lagos State Government led by its governor, Akinwunmi Ambode, has long been pushing the idea of a Cleaner Lagos. It started with a revamped trash collecting company and a hashtag that regularly trends on Twitter with the help of 21st Century propaganda machines, also known as Social Media Handlers. It passes itself off as a state-wide effort to consciously cleanse itself of its trash through as stated earlier, the collection of trash. And for the most part, ignoring the hills of trash I regularly see at Mushin and Tejuosho (and a lot more places I'm sure), the plot is working. Because in all honesty, and I'm sure it's shared by millions of other Lagosians, I thought Lagos was cleaner.
Now I'm not disputing that there's actually a collection of trash going on, or that other states aren't worse (the hills of garbage in the middle of Ibadan roads should be a tourism magnet). We've excelled at collecting trash since the days of Fashola (and by we, I mean LAWMA and the poster child of 'Itesiwaju Ipinle Eko', Visionscape). The problem is, we keep singing the praises of the government as it sweeps Lagos' dirt(we keep patting it on the back, retweeting #CleanerLagos and endorsing Mr. Ambode's second term) and we're so busy singing, that we're blind to where the dirt is being swept to: under the rug.
Let me explain myself further. On the 7th of March, my dad and I were on the road going home from church. We took our usual route through Ojota, going past the infamous landfill in all its olfactory glory (those who travel through that road should understand). Then it hit me: the landfill had been there before I was born and was a massive constant in my childhood. But it always seemed to be a fair distance away from the safety of our car. Why then was a stray hand creeping forward, begging to touch the road? Why was it now so close? I asked my dad that question and answered it myself: Lagos either isn't doing anything with the trash she collects or she isn't doing enough. So much emphasis has been placed on the collection of trash that we've completely forgotten that we need to actually do something about it. We have a trash problem; no amount of hashtagging will hide it, Lagos. And you know it. I'm not going to delve into census politics (that's for another day) but Lagos has well over 20 million people, is the economic nerve centre of a MINT-ed country and is a metropolis in the truest sense. It makes no sense that our only means of trash disposal is actually disposal itself (in landfills and incinerators and dumps generally). We're too big a city to still be doing that. Just look at other metropolises.
So what do we do, o wise one? How do we solve our trash problem? It's simple enough(wait for it)... Reduce. Reuse. Recycle. Yes, I said it. Triple R the trash instead of hiding it under the carpet. It's the 21st century and Lagos is only going to grow in population. You simply can't hide close to 30 million people's worth of refuse and sewage and defer to the next governor to solve it later. Such 'procrastinatory' tactics only create crises(note that crises is plural for crisis).
It takes a plan—a concrete plan—to get this done. So on our relatively traffic-free ride home, my dad and I came up with a plan. Mind you, it isn't the only way to get this problem solved, neither is it a crime to create a new plan, but I think it's a good skeleton to build a more expansive system.
- Firstly, start the process. Set and publicise a goal to reduce the amount of trash sent to landfills by half within a certain period of time. Sort and collect the refuse already in landfills into plastics, paper and others. There are people who do this regularly at landfills and dumps. Hire them to do a little bit more than collecting plastic bottles for Zobo.
- At the same time, begin a campaign on radio, social media and television encouraging citizens to reduce what they throw away, reuse what they would normally throw away(like plastic bags) and sort out their household trash into separate categories(Plastics, Paper and Others).
- Building on that idea, create a reward system awarding points per kilograms of trash recycled by individuals. The points may be converted to cash or serve as a form of discount at supermarkets. Also, prizes could be given to the cleanest LGA's per month. There's nothing like a prize to make people do the needful. However, a plan needs to be made so this will work effectively, along with a time frame. You can't reward people for doing what is right forever.
- Those 'Cleaner Lagos' bins strewn all over Lagos were a good idea. Expand that idea by making different colour-coded bins in the same place(for those categories mentioned earlier). For easier understanding, let the bin names be written in English and Yoruba. And also push it forward in the campaign.
- Charge investors and companies with aiding the Triple R effort(Reduce. Reuse. Recycle). The supermarkets, ‘Game’ and ‘Shoprite’ make thousands of new plastic bags every day for transporting goods. If they were to encourage individuals to save those bags and bring them on their next trip, it would have far-reaching effects over time. If Coca-Cola and PepsiCo were to encourage crates of used pet bottles to be brought to their distribution points instead of merely making new ones… These are just a few examples of what can be done.
- I assume LAWMA has offices in every LGA. If not, establish offices to serve as pick-up points where unrecycled trash is sorted. Alert interested parties to the availability of cheap raw materials for a price(or not, depending on your generosity). I'm sure it makes economic sense to recycle raw materials instead of hunting for fresh ones. Companies will come calling.
- Finally, a recycling industry can be established, under the management of LAWMA , of course. In the words of a wise Nigerian politician from Ogun state, "S*&t business is serious business'. Trash business is big business.
There. That's what my dad and I came up with on our drive back home. It's a basic, skeletal plan that simplifies what will take years to achieve. It's easy to dismiss the whole idea as too complex and difficult in favour of something more interesting like draconian revenue generation and unnecessarily-expensive-and-not-really-important projects on the island(Cable car. *cough cough*). But Lagos simply can't keep living this way. Instead of treating the skin problem, we've satisfied ourselves with the pleasures of itch-scratching. We, the people, and our government, ignored the elephant in the room when it was still a calf and we are still ignoring it now that it's grown big, tall and strong. If we don’t chase it out soon, it will outgrow the room. And when elephants outgrow places, they pulverise them.
I have just one more thing to say before I round off: Mr Ambode. We need to talk. 2019 is around the corner and I've heard talk from your party members and uninformed OAP's about how you've already 'surpassed' Tinubu and Fashola. (*laughs in Xhosa*) We both know that's not very accurate. So out of the kindness of my heart and in the spirit of Easter, I offer you this opportunity to be relevant in Lagos’ history. Just make an announcement kick-starting Lagos' recycling efforts and 2019 should be yours. Or you could ignore all I’ve said and let your opposition make that announcement for you, any option will do. Unlike some people, I couldn't care less what party is in power, if you're good, you're good. So please be good.
Signed: Potential voter.